Leading Through Insecurities

How are you leading through insecurities? Let’s just take a moment to recognize something: 

Insecurities can absolutely wreak havoc on our lives and cause a lot of problems. 

They can create jealousy and ruin a friendship, they can create doubt and ruin a relationship, and they can create doubt and prevent us from pursuing a dream that seems scary. Insecurities can cause worry and lead to anxiety, and they can make you not want to wear some of your favorite outfits or not want to go certain places if there is insecurity about what you look like or maybe who could be there that you’d have to interact with. 

But where do insecurities come from? What triggers them? What are they?

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I read an amazing quote recently by Bob Goff: “Insecurities don’t get conquered, they become understood, and when this happens they don’t have power over us any longer.”

What if we actually took that advice to heart with our own, personal insecurities? What if we got vulnerable enough with ourselves to look at the insecurities weighing us down and asking ourselves: “Why am I insecure about this? What does my ultimate goal look like, and is that a healthy, sustainable goal that will give me fulfillment or is it a shallow and insignificant goal that I need to remove from my mind? 

I know that if I personally can understand that my feeling insecure in my appearance, for example, is just because I spend more time than I used to on instagram seeing fake flawlessness, then I am able to mentally begin connecting the dots and realize that this insecurity has nothing to do with me! It has everything to do with media and social media. 

And from there, we grow past the insecurity and can begin leading through insecurities. 

Ask yourself where the insecurity comes from, and what it’s rooted in (what leads to it). Understanding insecurities can take them from being overpowering, overwhelming, and debilitating, to not even worth a second thought.

And from there, we can even reach the pinnacle of being grateful for our insecurities. 

RELATED: Fitting In & Finding a Sense of Belonging

Whoa, hold up! 

Why on earth am I supposed to be thankful for my insecurities? I thought these were supposed to be the things I’m allowed to complain about!

To stay with the same example of being insecure in physical appearance: The thought that you might not think you’re pretty enough should cause a small, balanced, reasonable increase in your humility.

And humility, for the record, is not self deprecation. Humility in this example would sound like,
“Well .. I’m not confident in this one area, and I have a lot of things I’m not the very best at, *but* I also recognize I have strengths to counter all those weaknesses. I’m growing and learning, and I am just fine with all of that.”

Humility is a critical part of the type of confidence I really admire: A calm and quiet confidence: It isn’t a showboaty, braggy confidence. It’s a humble confidence.

Wouldn’t you rather have an area in your life of weakness if it means having a prized, respected and crucial character refinement? I think so!!

Our insecurities can give way to so many wonderful things to be grateful for. Another great example could be the understanding that you’ll be able to bring to someone else walking through a season of struggling with insecurity once you have walked through it yourself. What a blessing you then become to that friend of your by being able to better understand what they’re walking though. 

Do the exercise. It’s worth it! 🙂 


January 19, 2021

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